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Purity

PURITY:

  1. A rapt, interested and ecstatic aloofness toward natural processes.
  2. A sewerage system that carries off everything, leaving the soul perfectly bald.
  3. A condition of the mind that causes one to snoop around in garbage-dumps and start a league.
  4. A plan of teaching things to children in which they are not interested.
  5. An ethereal nose giving the miraculous power of sensing the lavatory in the Elysian Fields before it smells the flowers. (There is purity of mind, purity of body and purity of speech. Any one person endowed with all three of these modes or purity is blessed, elect, saved, or otherwise atrophied and pickled.)